The Rose, The Thorns And One Great Acceptance : Gaining the respect you desire by staying true to yourself


Being centered in a crowd where the ultimate battle is your worth, your identity would always be your greatest weapon. And the social upbringings would always produce a same scenario; you, thinking twice unto how you should act. This is the social norm that consciously or unconsciously we always play when we deal to people. For what we basically need is acceptance. And in this world of prejudices, being accepted by the majority and the people we want is always our need. But the basic standard of acceptance would always rely to “being true”. So why play a role that doesn’t determine the identity as who you are? Afraid? You don’t have to!

Living in a world that partly sharing a bit of yourself and reveals the identity of somehow not-like-you is in reality not living at all. You might have and continue your life, but in some way or another you don’t really exist. Let me share you a simple story;

Once, there was this beautiful rose, she thinks that because of her thorns, people might not love her. So she covered her thorns with bandages. She became harmless and people started to adore her. When she gained her confidence, she was satisfied and reposed. Until time came, the people unconsciously got hurt by some little prickle. They noticed that the rose was just covering her thorns. They were angry, “You tricked us! You are harmful than we thought!” They yelled to the rose. The rose was taken aback, she was sorry, she cried, but she can’t do anything but accept the consequence. “I’m sorry!” She uttered. But the people were uncontrollable, “If you’ve just shown us your thorns at the first place, we could have prepared ourselves and accept it”. They shouted back.

This story tells us that in order to be accepted, we just have to be true to ourselves and to people around us. We need to let them know our good and bad sides, or even our strengths and weaknesses. For those who can accept and respect us are those people who really deserve our worth. The world is full of prejudices, people do always have to say anything. There would always be people who will like and dislike us. But the main point here is that we existed as who we are. We must be proud of it!

I could still recall what happened during the College Editors Guild of the Philippines (CEGP) Convention at Tacloban, Leyte when I confessed myself as bi while having our usual lunch with the Tolentine Star. They just all smiled and offered me a big warmth of acceptance. Then during our lovenote program, someone sent a piece of paper tinted with question, “May I know who’s ‘bi’ here? Kindly raise their hands”. Upon hearing the question, I just smiled and raised my hand. And there were people staring at me and whispered “Oh! He’s bisexual.”  We just all laughed! The magic of accepting who you are would also bring respect, stronger bond to your peers and even strength to live your life. It was in that moment were I developed a since of pride to myself knowing that there are those who still respect me as who I am (and I thank them all for that).

This world we live is a realm of human standards, and we are influenced by it in order to fit in. Because we are dealing too much on how the people think we should become and not unto what we are. Let’s set aside that damn mentality, what’s important is you have your true identity in this world, not fake and not borrowed. Regardless of what you are, what age, what gender, what status or what interest. Whether you’re a geek, emo, punk, dyke, gay, lesbian, trasher or a total crap – be proud of your identity! Like what we could learn in the story, a rose, wouldn’t be a rose without a thorn.


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